Novel "The penultimate woman" Ms. Oskamp exposes Mr. Hürlimann - and herself
She was the partner of writer Thomas Hürlimann (73) for two decades. Now Katja Oskamp (54) has written a book about it: An unsparing account of her relationship with an older man.
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- In her novel "Die vorletzte Frau", Berlin author Katja Oskamp writes about her relationship with a much older man.
- The man is the Swiss writer Thomas Hürlimann and son of former CVP Federal Councillor Hans Hürlimann (1918 to 1994).
- The majority of previous reviewers of the unsparing report have more or less gleefully pounced on the sex scenes in it. The critics forgot Oskamp's wonderfully direct language and the great description of her own inner turmoil.
- The past often hurts. You can flee from it or draw conclusions. Katja Oskamp has done this and written a wonderful novel about it.
"He conjured up a tabby thing, which he put around my neck and fastened tightly at the nape. There he also hooked the small carabiner of the accompanying leash, placed it over my collarbone, threaded it through my neckline and under my dress. We ignored the waiter's gaze."
Memories and indiscretions. These are the ingredients that make this book a special kind of reading pleasure. I admit, even I blushed from time to time while reading it on the sofa.
In her novel "Die vorletzte Frau", Katja Oskamp deals with her life and love story with the Swiss writer Thomas Hürlimann.
And she does so in such an unsparing way that the NZZ was outraged: "Oskamp's self-disclosure is above all a humiliation of her long-time friend."
Sex and God
The NZZ's indignation may have something to do with the fact that Hürlimann is not only an author, but also the son of CVP Federal Councillor Hans Hürlimann (1918 to 1994). That's right, the party with the word "Christian" in its name that became "Die Mitte" three years ago.
Sex and God. Two topics that immediately make many people, not least believers, see red. And then talk or even write about it in public: No, not at all.
"I was an elderly and chubby princess who nobody wanted to crown queen. But I remained a princess, and a princess is not abandoned, a princess abandons herself."
Declaration of love or reckoning? It is known that Thomas Hürlimann read Katja Oskamp's text before it was published. The two had little contact after their separation.
"You've written a wonderful love story," the 73-year-old is said to have said to his ex-partner, according to Der Spiegel. He was proud to be part of it. Hürlimann also wrote about his ex in his novel "Heimkehr", which was published six years ago.
Not a word from Thomas Hürlimann about the fact that he often doesn't come off particularly well in Katja Oskamp's book. However, the same also applies to his ex-partner.
It is precisely this unvarnished honesty that makes "Die vorletzte Frau" so true to life. And worth reading.
Student and writer
She is a student, he is a writer when they meet for the first time. There is a 19-year age difference between them. He, who is called Tosch in the book, is a guest lecturer at the Leipzig Literature Institute. She has to take an exam with him.
A little later, he makes a confession to her: "Before I met you, I was dead. My cock was dead." She can't believe that he fancies her - and especially her bottom. "I was deader than you, Tosch," she replies.
Then it's off with the two dead men bringing each other to life.
He likes verbal eroticism and role play. In the "Lotterbett" he pontificates about how sex has to be kinky, otherwise he'll fall asleep. But she does it too: "When we left the pub, I grabbed Tosch between the legs."
When Tosch furnishes his apartment in Berlin, he only wants to go shopping in a Swedish furniture store on the condition that his new favorite woman "wears suspenders".
Plain language and tooth inflammation
"What the author describes sounds so real, so immediate, as if it had actually happened," comments Der Spiegel. And she is right.
Katja Oskamp has opted for plain language.
The student and the writer are two adults. They get involved with each other, fully aware of their shortcomings. A disastrous affair? No. A disastrous relationship? Probably yes.
"Memory is a tender bitch. She tricks and evades, ambushes and caresses so suddenly that I don't believe a word she says. I'm afraid of being unfair, self-righteous. I'm afraid Tosch might shout: Shut up! It's over, but as it was, it was good!"
The majority of previous reviewers of the ruthless report pounced on the sex scenes in it with more or less relish. The critics forgot Oskamp's wonderfully direct language and the great description of her own inner turmoil.
"I can only observe the small things," says Katja Oskamp about her novel in Der Spiegel, "I can't make the big political connections. Nor do I want to." All the more beautifully she dissects everyday life, which can be so damn awful from time to time.
When she suffers from a tooth infection and tearfully asks Tosch for help, he says on the phone: "You're not going to stop me from working like this."
Chiropodist and humanity
Nothing seems too embarrassing or too private for Katja Oskamp in her novel "The Penultimate Woman".
Tosch coached the author for many years, commenting on many of her texts before sending them to the newspaper editors or publishers. And she did the same with his texts.
Oh yes, and the mother of a daughter also took care of his dirty laundry at weekends when he visited her for a night or two.
"In terms of role selection, the years between thirty and forty were good years. Mother, lover, writer - three main roles between which I oscillated devotedly so that they formed the strong triad that kept me going. I wished it would stay that way, maybe I even secretly dreamed of going one better."
But now Oskamp has stepped out of Hürlimann's shadow. Back in 2007, after the publication of her novel "Die Staubfängerin", she was considered a promising debut author.
After that, success, at least as an author, increasingly failed to materialize. Katja Oskamp subsequently trained as a pedicurist. She worked in a nail salon in Berlin's prefabricated housing estate Marzahn.
The author did something that for other people would be tantamount to failure: during the day, she nursed her feet, and in the evening she wrote down what she had heard during the day. These are funny stories full of humanity - seen from the soles of her feet.
In "Marzahn, mon amour - Geschichten einer Fusspflegerin" (Marzahn, mon amour - Stories of a chiropodist), she wrote about Mrs. Guse, who is moving away from the world in reverse gear. She wrote about Mr. Pietsch, the ex-functionary. And of Mr. Paulke, who was one of the first residents of the district 40 years ago.
Future and hope
Katja Oskamp may already have the first two-thirds of her life behind her. During this time, she often thought badly of herself. Or made herself a "second-row face" alongside her ex-partner Tosch.
At the end of her latest novel, she now asks herself what role she will embody in the third third of her life?
Well then, she has certainly started with confidence. And we can be confident that the new partner will do the author good - better than Tosch, in any case.
"The new man always says 'Come here' and never 'Go away'. I didn't give him any egg cups or handcuffs, no leporello or standing desk, but my pioneer ID card from 1976."
The past often hurts. You can flee from it or draw conclusions. Katja Oskamp did just that and wrote a wonderful novel about it.
And now she is sitting where she once sat as an author: in the front row.
The passages in italics are original quotes from the novel "Die vorletzte Frau" by Katja Oskamp, published by Park x Ullstein.